The Morning Person

I know. Gross, right?

I am a rare bird.  I am one of those people who are not monsters when they roll out of bed and face the inevitable responsibility of having to be awake for an entire day.  I do not wish to sleep more than I need.  There is nothing in me that wants to stay in the toasty warm cinnamon bun of blankets for hours on end.  I am a sick, twisted freak.  I am…a morning person.

It was only recently that it occurred to me that the world is not evenly divided up between morning people and night people.  The overwhelming majority of people are night people.   Just a precious few weirdos are able to wake up and immediately get moving without the feeling of life crushing your every move.  There is also a popular misunderstanding about morning people.  They are not happy and cheerful; they are just functional in the morning.  It is only through the prism of being a grouch in the morning that anyone who isn’t miserable is some cheery Ned Flanders-like cretin that should be shot on sight.  We are merely awake and moving around, and we aren’t bitching about it every morning.  We take a lot of shit from night people.

Morning people do not choose their lot in life.  They are born that way.  I have often longed to sleep a little more or enjoy staying up to the wee hours.  My body rejects it over and over.  There comes a time when you have to listen to your brain and accept who you are.  You get shit done while others consume caffeine.  You go to bed early because there is no such thing as catching up on sleep.  You and the sun are simpatico.  Where he goes, you go.

Sure, a morning person can enjoy late-night fun.  Most likely they will pay for it more severely than a night person.  Along with the hangover and regret comes a sense of missing something because you may have slept forty-five minutes later than normal.  This feeling is buried deep in the DNA.  Maybe is a gene for ancient warriors on a dawn patrol, or protectors of the homestead.  Maybe we were the first chefs, ready to nourish the village before everyone else awakened to do whatever people in villages did back then.

Night people have more fun, for sure.  The fun industry is targeted to them.  But we of the early day persuasion have a few benefits that night people do not share.  Most of them have to do with enjoying peace and quiet.  There is nothing quite like a crisp, early Sunday morning with a coffee and warm socks while most of the world is sleeping it off. If you live in the country, the animals are out and in full throat.  If you are closer to the city, traffic is barely a whisper.  I love taking a walk during those hours.  I also love writing and chatting with whoever’s up and around.  And even if I’m alone, I enjoy a book or a crossword.  It’s a little stiff, and it lacks the excitement of nightlife, but it has its own rewards.

More importantly, I think night people and morning people need each other.  Lots of people have trouble getting out of bed and focusing, others need help getting out after dark and enjoying life.  Some have their best creative moments before noon, others have these moments at midnight.  Nature has provided humanity with those in both camps; those who greet the day and those who tell it to fuck off.  It is a symbiotic relationship that is as old as civilization itself.  Morning people are not freaks, they have a place in the natural order.

So, get off our goddamned backs!